Most of us have lost someone we love. We do not get through life without losing a parent, a friend, and even a sibling; however losing your child does not compare. Sadly I only know this from my own experience. I lost my mother in 1988, my father in 2006, my brother in 2011…..and our beautiful daughter Rebekah April 8th, 2021.
No one can ever replace your parents. They brought you into this world and raised you. You are literally their DNA, and losing them is heartbreaking. Losing a sibling is very similar. You grew up with them, and you shared your life with them in ways that is far different than a friend. Losing my only brother was painful in so many ways; but our last phone call and our prayer together is something I will never forget! It brought such a peace to my heart knowing where his heart was.
So the question, “Does time heal our wounds?” Speaking from my own personal experience, my answer is no! Time has nothing to do with healing anyones broken heart. Time is simply a measurement of our daily existence on this earth. We continue to tear another month off our calendars every thirty days until we start all over again on January 1st. We have just simply moved farther away in time from our loss. The real and raw intensity has lessened over time, but it does not bring healing. So what does bring healing?
I can obviously only speak for myself, because everyone has to confront their own loss and grief personally. I’ve built my life on the foundation of faith in the One true God of the Bible and I believe every word from Genesis to Revelation. Jesus is the Rock of my salvation….building my life on anything else is sinking sand. Matthew 7:24-27 Does this mean that I fully understand every loss and sorrow that I have encountered? No, absolutely no! And some will ask, “then how do you stand on the promises of God in the Bible?”
There are many promises that are answered and fulfilled in ways that we may never understand this side of heaven. It does not mean that I have never questioned or agonized over my loss or pain; but what it does mean is that I know the God whom I love and serve! He is a good God, and He loves us beyond anything that we can fully comprehend. As long as we walk this earth we will have pain, loss, suffering and in-justice. Why? Because we live in a fallen world! So how do we get through it?
“These things I have spoken to you, that in Me you may have peace. In the world you will have tribulation; but be of good cheer, I have overcome the world.” John 16:33 Take note of two small words in this verse…..may and will. It shows us two absolutes. We can choose to have peace in this world, but it only comes by choosing to live in Him. The other is that “we will” have tribulation in this world. That is guaranteed!
The promise of good cheer is one that I cannot refuse! It means that no matter my pain or loss in this world, I can choose to have a virtuous and valuable comfort, courage and confidence. This is the meaning of His good cheer. Nothing in this world has an offer even close to this!
So is my brokenness healed? No. There’s not a day that goes by that I do not see her face, and miss all her perfectly organized little ways! Her extensive Lululemon wardrobe, and all things orange! She loved her son Mehrik fiercely. I could fill photo albums of the two them together everywhere. Rebekah was passionate to capture every precious moment and event. She orchestrated and organized all our holidays and especially the “trio birthday” in September. She shared a birthday with her two little brothers; Joseph & Daniel. She was not so happy to share this event with them as teenager, because she maintained they stole her birthday 😂. However, as she matured she turned it into a major fall event. September 28th will never be the same without her.
I cannot wait for our heavenly reunion! “In this you greatly rejoice, though now for a little while, if need be, you have been grieved by various trials, that the testing of your faith, being much more precious than gold that perishes, though it be tested by fire, may be found to praise, honor, and glory at the revelation of Jesus Christ, whom having not seen you love.” 1 Peter 1:7-8
Beautifully said.